As we grow up making new friends becomes increasingly more difficult. Changing jobs, moving towns and having kids being exceptions that force us into new (and perhaps unwanted) relationships. Even though I am an awkward, control freak who isn't big on social graces, I relish making new friends, and here are some of my techniques.
1. Do things that you like. Don't forget that when you are doing things you like; hiking, swimming, laughing, ukeing, singing, you are a likeable you. People like people who share similar interests and show enthusiasm.
2. Do things you like alone. Being alone in public is awkward, but it's the best way to force you to talk to strangers. And a stranger is just a friend you haven't met. Though a stranger can also be a strange person, and it would be best not to become their friend. The more you meet people the better you will get at recognizing these Strangers.
3. Do things that you don't like, and see who else doesn't like them. Because sharing a common interest is key to a new friendship. And hatred seems to unite faster than love...sadly.
4. Get into trouble. I met one of my favourite people in traffic court- though I guess that can also qualify as doing something you don't like.
5. Eavesdropping is a useful tool. Listening in on a stranger's conversation and providing a dynamite drop in can stimulate conversation (though not always). Alternatively, it can also get you slapped, launch them into tears or create an embarrassing scene.
6. Tell people how much your current friends like you. It may be a lie, but your new friend will never know. I mean they will only find out when they become a friend who doesn't like you.
7. Take a good long look at your family. You can find the most surprising types of friends within your family. They can be tall friends, short friends, even friends with similar DNA! And these people already understand you- well, maybe understand isn't the right word, but my family knows what I mean.
8. Steal friends from your current friends. By making friends with your friend's friends, you increase your odds of being included. The more we get together, together, together, the more we get together, the happier we'll be. Only problem, don't vent about these friends to their friends... As the tighter the hive, the buzzier the bees.* insert hands on hips and cautious finger wag.
9. As a last ditch effort, steal something (like a neat yellow purse or jacket in inclement weather) and refuse any reward money when you return it. Start a conversation from there about what an amazing friend you would be (stealing aside).
These aren't foolproof techniques (oh wait, I am a fool and I use them...) And though I wouldn't recommend #9 if you have 2 strikes, I think that the ability to make new friends is an important tool to use. And we all know how I feel about tools, eh Hubby?
1. Do things that you like. Don't forget that when you are doing things you like; hiking, swimming, laughing, ukeing, singing, you are a likeable you. People like people who share similar interests and show enthusiasm.
2. Do things you like alone. Being alone in public is awkward, but it's the best way to force you to talk to strangers. And a stranger is just a friend you haven't met. Though a stranger can also be a strange person, and it would be best not to become their friend. The more you meet people the better you will get at recognizing these Strangers.
3. Do things that you don't like, and see who else doesn't like them. Because sharing a common interest is key to a new friendship. And hatred seems to unite faster than love...sadly.
4. Get into trouble. I met one of my favourite people in traffic court- though I guess that can also qualify as doing something you don't like.
5. Eavesdropping is a useful tool. Listening in on a stranger's conversation and providing a dynamite drop in can stimulate conversation (though not always). Alternatively, it can also get you slapped, launch them into tears or create an embarrassing scene.
6. Tell people how much your current friends like you. It may be a lie, but your new friend will never know. I mean they will only find out when they become a friend who doesn't like you.
7. Take a good long look at your family. You can find the most surprising types of friends within your family. They can be tall friends, short friends, even friends with similar DNA! And these people already understand you- well, maybe understand isn't the right word, but my family knows what I mean.
8. Steal friends from your current friends. By making friends with your friend's friends, you increase your odds of being included. The more we get together, together, together, the more we get together, the happier we'll be. Only problem, don't vent about these friends to their friends... As the tighter the hive, the buzzier the bees.* insert hands on hips and cautious finger wag.
9. As a last ditch effort, steal something (like a neat yellow purse or jacket in inclement weather) and refuse any reward money when you return it. Start a conversation from there about what an amazing friend you would be (stealing aside).
These aren't foolproof techniques (oh wait, I am a fool and I use them...) And though I wouldn't recommend #9 if you have 2 strikes, I think that the ability to make new friends is an important tool to use. And we all know how I feel about tools, eh Hubby?
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