As you may have gathered I am moving tomorrow. The teeny, tiny memorabilia jammed shoebox I live in right now has been my home for the last 4 years. WHA? Four years spent in what was supposed to be a 6 month solution- oh how we veered off plan. And those of you who've seen this inner-child's cave have expressed that you wouldn't have been able to deal with living here- with your significant other plus dog plus cat+/- fish. So I just wanted to say nah-nah-nah-nah-nah I am better than you are:P Okay so maybe not better, but perhaps more tolerant, kind, patient, self-secure and well, better I guess. Whoa, I got away for a minute there. Can I say, I am quite elated that I managed not to shank, shiv or regular stab someone (mainly my loving Hubby). Being an "erratic personality" as I am the following list would have been just cause:
1. The washing machine that fits 3 pairs of undies, 2 pairs of socks and 1/2 cup of disappointment. It takes 3 hours to run a cycle of laundry and everything comes out ready for my american girl doll to wear.
2. One room- one room... one not very big room
3. Everything centres around the bed, and it's gotta be uncomfortable for people who visit us... I mean it's our bed. Hey everybody, come over and sit on our marital bed, that's your only option. Comfy yet?*insert creepy smile
4. One closet to rule them all- within this tiny condo closet all things must be stored- EVERYTHING: Winter coats, rain boots, kitty litter, anything that doesn't fit under the bathroom sink, extra dog poop bags, formal wear, paper towels, nautical ships wrecks, everything. Oh and did I mention half of that closet is a stacked washer/dryer? Yeah for 4 years two people used 1/2 of a closet.
5. The fire detector which is dangling precariously from our ceiling. One day 2 years ago it just let go, and now hangs there uselessly, it's given up, oh except if we're using the stove or the oven or making toast- then that lazy SOB screams bloody murder, and for what? the steam of an open oven door- All hands on deck- what a dick, you hear that fire detector, you're a dick.
6. The under the sink garbage that is too big and you have to open the right one before you can open the actual garbage and then close them in reverse order. Which doesn't sound like a big problem- except if you have a split bag of something leaking all over the GD place.
7. Eating dinner in my bedroom which is also my kitchen. We have a table straddling our bed which is our diningroom table, but it's really just a wood slab over our bed. Do you know how hard it is to eat every meal with your legs crossed? C'mon!
8. One room, did I already say that, well I really mean it. It's the worst, Micro-loft my ass.
With this scathing list of 8 items, it sounds all bad, but I will miss my rooftop patio with BBQs and Muskoka chairs and the CN Tower view, the park/dog toilet being next door, the quick walk to the Lakeshore, the Ossington bus, waiting at a King streetcar stop, being so close to my husband, cat and dog all the time and my fav Starbucks baristas who've finally mastered my customize Douche bag drink. Though what I will miss most is bitchin' about how much of a struggle it is living in this space:) But Pain+Time=Funny too bad it wasn't actually that painful.
1. The washing machine that fits 3 pairs of undies, 2 pairs of socks and 1/2 cup of disappointment. It takes 3 hours to run a cycle of laundry and everything comes out ready for my american girl doll to wear.
2. One room- one room... one not very big room
3. Everything centres around the bed, and it's gotta be uncomfortable for people who visit us... I mean it's our bed. Hey everybody, come over and sit on our marital bed, that's your only option. Comfy yet?*insert creepy smile
4. One closet to rule them all- within this tiny condo closet all things must be stored- EVERYTHING: Winter coats, rain boots, kitty litter, anything that doesn't fit under the bathroom sink, extra dog poop bags, formal wear, paper towels, nautical ships wrecks, everything. Oh and did I mention half of that closet is a stacked washer/dryer? Yeah for 4 years two people used 1/2 of a closet.
5. The fire detector which is dangling precariously from our ceiling. One day 2 years ago it just let go, and now hangs there uselessly, it's given up, oh except if we're using the stove or the oven or making toast- then that lazy SOB screams bloody murder, and for what? the steam of an open oven door- All hands on deck- what a dick, you hear that fire detector, you're a dick.
6. The under the sink garbage that is too big and you have to open the right one before you can open the actual garbage and then close them in reverse order. Which doesn't sound like a big problem- except if you have a split bag of something leaking all over the GD place.
7. Eating dinner in my bedroom which is also my kitchen. We have a table straddling our bed which is our diningroom table, but it's really just a wood slab over our bed. Do you know how hard it is to eat every meal with your legs crossed? C'mon!
8. One room, did I already say that, well I really mean it. It's the worst, Micro-loft my ass.
With this scathing list of 8 items, it sounds all bad, but I will miss my rooftop patio with BBQs and Muskoka chairs and the CN Tower view, the park/dog toilet being next door, the quick walk to the Lakeshore, the Ossington bus, waiting at a King streetcar stop, being so close to my husband, cat and dog all the time and my fav Starbucks baristas who've finally mastered my customize Douche bag drink. Though what I will miss most is bitchin' about how much of a struggle it is living in this space:) But Pain+Time=Funny too bad it wasn't actually that painful.
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