Have you ever wanted anything so badly you started day dreaming about it? Fantasizing and creating the perfect moment. Hello, my name is Melicious and I an anticipation addict. When something exciting is planned or an important date is in the near future, I can't help myself. I start thinking about all the possibilities that special moment holds. Building up the moment until it becomes the best, most memorable and mind-blowing event of all time.
As you may have guessed, it's not the easiest of addictions. An adrenaline junkie gets his fix by doing something dangerous, careless even. Pyromaniacs light things on fire. Nyphos- like to do it. Little old me? I blow things out of proportion. Re-imagining the possibilities and pushing the boundaries of the probable. Which always leads to disappointment. Try being 7 year old me waiting what felt like 3 years between birthdays. Or a weekend slumber party, which was only days away being built into the world's greatest adventure, it was tough to keep me engaged:$ The plans happening in my head were so much more interesting. I think that my addiction prevented me from enjoying the some really special days of our lives. In waiting and planning and dreaming about the bestest-most-perfect day, I never realized that something special is often unplanned. I build up an occasion to the level that no matter what, I will be disappointed.
When I was growing up there were huge advancements in technology. We went from walk-mans to disc-mans. Dual tape decks to 5 CD changers. And invented surround sound and widescreen TVs. Poppa was keen to stay on the cutting edge. But it means I now expect that of myself. With new apps, devices and upgrades every 3 months; it's getting expensive. I remember growing up and the excruciating wait from movie box office to VHS, which became faster with the DVD and even faster now with MP4s. Anticipation quashed by the next big thing, just as you've learned the ins and outs of the current model. How could I ever be happy if I am always a step behind?
One of the best birthdays I had was a surprise party. I knew my big one-seven was coming up, but everyone was busy. Nobody making plans with me, everyone avoiding all talk of it. I didn't have time to build up the event. I had no idea it was happening. Plus I was too busy concocting a far- fetched story about a lonely girl, stuck between the world of children and the universe of grown ups; left all alone and celebrating my birthday with a lone candle on a lonely cupcake. So, when I walked through the door to a dark house, only to have the lights snapped on and people screaming, I almost wet my pants. Same thing happened when Hubby proposed. He told me he'd be one place, he showed up in another and I was certain that he was a future version of himself come back to the past to warn me of some distant snagged our life had hit, trying to correct the past to perfect the future... Okay, wait, wait, wait, hold the phone and all the horses. I may have just identified another problem: exaggeration imagination.
What I thought was one affliction; I have now identified as many. What's the clinical name for my disease, you ask? How about- Anticipation Imagination exacerbation Marathonitis, for short. That's quite a handle but they say knowing is half the battle. So I'll keep fighting for the best-brightest and most memorable life, and try to keep it closer to reality. Thanks for the online diagnosis Doctor Blog:)
As you may have guessed, it's not the easiest of addictions. An adrenaline junkie gets his fix by doing something dangerous, careless even. Pyromaniacs light things on fire. Nyphos- like to do it. Little old me? I blow things out of proportion. Re-imagining the possibilities and pushing the boundaries of the probable. Which always leads to disappointment. Try being 7 year old me waiting what felt like 3 years between birthdays. Or a weekend slumber party, which was only days away being built into the world's greatest adventure, it was tough to keep me engaged:$ The plans happening in my head were so much more interesting. I think that my addiction prevented me from enjoying the some really special days of our lives. In waiting and planning and dreaming about the bestest-most-perfect day, I never realized that something special is often unplanned. I build up an occasion to the level that no matter what, I will be disappointed.
When I was growing up there were huge advancements in technology. We went from walk-mans to disc-mans. Dual tape decks to 5 CD changers. And invented surround sound and widescreen TVs. Poppa was keen to stay on the cutting edge. But it means I now expect that of myself. With new apps, devices and upgrades every 3 months; it's getting expensive. I remember growing up and the excruciating wait from movie box office to VHS, which became faster with the DVD and even faster now with MP4s. Anticipation quashed by the next big thing, just as you've learned the ins and outs of the current model. How could I ever be happy if I am always a step behind?
One of the best birthdays I had was a surprise party. I knew my big one-seven was coming up, but everyone was busy. Nobody making plans with me, everyone avoiding all talk of it. I didn't have time to build up the event. I had no idea it was happening. Plus I was too busy concocting a far- fetched story about a lonely girl, stuck between the world of children and the universe of grown ups; left all alone and celebrating my birthday with a lone candle on a lonely cupcake. So, when I walked through the door to a dark house, only to have the lights snapped on and people screaming, I almost wet my pants. Same thing happened when Hubby proposed. He told me he'd be one place, he showed up in another and I was certain that he was a future version of himself come back to the past to warn me of some distant snagged our life had hit, trying to correct the past to perfect the future... Okay, wait, wait, wait, hold the phone and all the horses. I may have just identified another problem: exaggeration imagination.
What I thought was one affliction; I have now identified as many. What's the clinical name for my disease, you ask? How about- Anticipation Imagination exacerbation Marathonitis, for short. That's quite a handle but they say knowing is half the battle. So I'll keep fighting for the best-brightest and most memorable life, and try to keep it closer to reality. Thanks for the online diagnosis Doctor Blog:)
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